Well, you know the Swiss are ALL about control... so Swiss girls can probably hit a perfect F sharp when they want to.
My girlfriend can probably out-dress most, and on a far lower budget, and meanwhile beat the crap out of any nay-sayers (anyone who wants to nay-say, please let me know! )
Personally, I like women to be women, otherwise, why bother, as men are so much easier to deal with!
Tom
I do understand that I can't expect to come to a new country and everything will be the same as home.... and I also know that it is folly to try and pin down a fixed idea of "normal". I guess I was just wondering if others agreed that Swiss women are more dainty than North American women.
I'm encouraged by those who disagree...
HOORAY! They do exist! I guess it might just be a coincidence that the women I've met aren't like that. I have to find these girls...
Awesome.
I'm 24.
I'm not a beast, I promise. I have manners, and I am careful to only 'let my hair down' when in the right context. I was just scared that in Switzerland I would NEVER be in the right context, and would have to be at my most feminine at all times in order to integrate. But others in this forum seem to disagree.
Although I still haven't put my finger on exactly how genders differ here in Switzerland, I see that I needn't fear becoming a Stepford Wife here... I just have to find the right people to hang out with.
Neigh!!!
almost like moo.
Yep, all the hip and trendy and sexy EF'ers hang out there on Thursday evenings. Sometimes I go too.
There is a simple rule: Anything what doesn't offend is OK.
Laughing/shouting loudly: if it's in a bar with noisy music - why not.
If it's in a quiet coffee or tea room - There's no need for either, your conversation partner can hear you just fine.
Belching contests: with your friends - sure.
But not in a nice restaurant or on public transportation.
You see - it's all according to the situation. Tomboyish behaviour is sometimes taken as "well, she's a bit a tomboy, but she's ok".
With "hooker-looking-teens" (and twens) most people just hope they grew up quickly and start developing some sense.
Believe me: We are not nice and gentle. Don't confuse politeness with gentleness. And most of us can be very pointed, while still minding manners. Dressing nicely is just another way of showing respect to the other people we are meeting in daily life. It's a sign of showing "I care" - because no-one would like to look at unwashed faces, greasy hair, dirty clothing, belching and swearing items. It's a very small effort to drive a comb through your hair, use a clean t-shirt, use a deodorant and if you're feeling posh - iron your shirt before wearing.
On the elephant issue: I feel quite elephantish myself (but not as much as back in Japan), as I am a tad taller than average, I don't wear shoes what ruin my feet (but lend the wearer a "feminine" walk (or crippled, depending on the lady). I ignore trends and fashion, and define my own style; I have a brain, I use it regularely and I don't hide the fact: so yes, I know the feeling of sticking out only too well.
No - there are quite some issues - you do see this right. But it's the old game "If you are in Rome, behave like a Roman. Or remain a visitor"
On the issues you mentioned above:
- It's a slow change - but change is on. At the moment, there are still too few options for working parents (part-time), daycare is horribly expensive, and if a couple (especially men) can't reduce their work on part-time to have some time with his children, usually the family settles on "the one with the lower income becomes the stay-at-home-parent". As even today women earn less than men - it's the woman what becomes a house-wife and soccer-mum.
The need for change is here, but politics still slack behind. It took us more than 3 attempts to have a paid maternity leave...
- I long for the day when mandatory military service for men will be over.
- Ehm - the 90ies please. At least in one canton. And yes - we are nearly as bad as Saudi Arabia. Until 1989 a women needed the permission of her husband to work outside the house. You see - we women are catching up. When I went to school, there was a poster in the tram, sporting "imagine, in the Council Federal is also a male member" - to change the perspective, as at that point Ms Dreyfuss was the only woman in the council.
Nope - not crazy, but don't confuse gender roles with manners ;-)
is this why the trains smell so bad in the summer?
Deodorant, is not elective... perfume/cologne on the other hand...
and OP, you haven't said where you're coming from? "I'm from Canada", is like "I'm from Asia" or "I'm from Oceana"; means nothing.
Aside from that... I do understand what you're getting at, but at 24... I'm sorry, but only in very certain circles is that kind of "freedom" even remotely acceptable (yes, even in the great wild north). 16, maybe tolerated, but 24?
Especially coming from Canada, were society, culture, manner and respect are so drastically advanced (not always a great thing), it does sometimes feel a bit backwards here.
But they have had it this way for a long time, and are very set in their ways, so the best bet is to take the 'melting pot' approach and just try your best to blend in and follow suit. Or be strong and proud, but be prepared for backlash and akwardness. C'est la vie!
On the excessive use of perfume... Ouch. I get headaches easily when sitting next to someone who apparently took a bath in that substance.
I usually inquire if they did - the reactions one can imagine. Though it is easy to overdose with perfume, especially if one is using it daily - the nose becomes accustomed to the smell, and the lady (or gent) doesn't "smell" the scent anymore, unless another two or three splashes are applied...
Working mothers:
It's very hard to be a working mother here. School hours change daily. Kids eat lunch at home. There are lots of school days off throughout the year. Unless you have a mother, family or good friends available for babysitting, it's easier just to stay at home.
Be kind to the Swiss women. They are trying so hard to do what they feel is right for their family and for themselves.
How about just be kind to everyone, I don't think it's a gender role to do what is right for family and one's self.