I am close to my screen test so it does inspire me for this topic.
I have no idea how the topic will go but lets see.
Here is the situation, you are pregnant (or your partner) and when the 12 weeks screen comes, you find yourself in front of this choice:
1- Do the test and find out if the baby has Down Syndrom or
2- Don't do the test and let it to fate.
If you would go for number 1, would this affect your decision to keep the baby or not? Or would you keep the baby no matter what and get prepared for the futur?
Now, if you don't like the topic, you keep walking. After all the conversation yesterday about abortion, contraception and father now wanting responsability, I am curious to know people's feeling on this matter.
Lets be nice to each other in the same time, please!
I only got the test done with my third child, and afterwards I wondered why I had bothered.
And the test doesn't actually give you a diagnosis, just a calculated statistically probabability. Amniocentesis can give you a definitive diagnosis but there is a small risk of miscarriage...
And no, my husband and I would not abort a child because of down syndrome...
There is no easy answer to this. What one couple would be able to cope with, another would not. So it really is down to the individual. I could never personally say if somebody was right or wrong.
I had the test with my children, have no idea what I would have actually done if had a result indicating there was something atypical, but my rationale for wanting the test was to be completely prepared at the birth and after as well. Not only emotionally/mentally but there can in some cases be required much more medical attention and therapy for a child born with special needs --sometimes immediately, and just in my opinion preparation/research before hand could go a long way.
When you say test do you mean when they test the fluid? At my 12 week scan my doc automatically measured the Nucal fold for Downs without really asking and took bloods to test for something else, I got the call a few days later saying my chances of the baby having downs was something like 168 in 1 when for most women my age it was about 35 in 1 so he just said all was good and no point doing any further tests.
If the results had come back low and at risk I think I would have had the other tests done and then I would have made our decisions upon that result and i have no idea what that choice would be if I am honest.
I did do the test and it came up as a positive. I scheduled an amniocentesis for more information. This procedure is not without risk, but I needed verification just what the future would hold.
For the 6 weeks between the first test results and the amnio reslults I was unable to enjoy the best phase of pregnancy - after morning sickness and before my "bump" became my book rest and I couldn't see my shoes anymore.
The final result was: My daughter (at least the test was correct on that point) was perfectly fine and the first screen was false.
I didn't do the screen the second time around because I learned over those lost weeks that it wouldn't have made one bit of difference if she did have Downs. She would have been born into a loving and supportive family no matter what the test said.
Been there, done that, and the answers you come up with in these theoretical what if scenarios are not the ones you come up with after the 12 week test which are not the same conclusions as the ones you come up with post amnio and still not the same ones after the 5 month test in case the amnio comes up negative.
This is an important factor to consider. False positives are a lot more prevalent than many people think (dependent on the test, obviously). They cause unneeded stress for naught.
If it won't affect your decision, don't take the test.
Since I don't really want to get pregnant and have kids, I'd have to say that I cannot tell whether I would or wouldn't have the test done. However, I'd like to share a story with everybody. A couple of weeks ago, I was standing at the trainstation waiting for my ride, when I've noticed something so beautiful that I wanted to take a picture (which I refrained nevertheless). Amongst the masses of grey and offwhite people, whom all were frowning and generally miserable looking, there was this young autistic man being pushed in a wheelchair. He was not only the sole person smiling....he was downright having a ball!
Thus, an autistic person can cerrtainly live a good and happy life....but I can imagine that it could be stressfull both emotionally as well as financially to the parents.
I never had the test done and never would because I take the baby as it is. Nobody says a person with Down Syndrome cannot live a happy life ... and in some other thread about this I told the story of my cousin's baby who was said to have it but she didn't want an abortion and the girl is perfectly healthy.
I think it's more about how parents think they could cope. It would scare the hell out of me if our tests had come back positive and I wouldn't judge anyone else for feeling that fear and despair at the possibility of having a baby with downs or any other disability. Of course we all know when needed people just cope but still...
And again I am asking is this the full on amnio fluid test or just the nucal fold measurement on the scan test we are talking about? MacGregors Daughter did you not have the nucal fold measurement done either?
I would personally that my companion do the test because if the baby has the Down Syndrom, we need to prepare ourselves. (if my companion want to keep the baby, of course, but that's another story.)
I believe that we come on this planet to do something. If I was going to have a baby with that syndrom, it would mean that, not only I, but also my companion and the incoming soul have decided together that we have this experience to live together.
Now it can be a bit frightening and we always have the possibility to refuse at the last moment.
It will just put this experience to another time in our life, in another form,
But that's what I believe.
Sorry to put that thing, but I always think it's important to see it also on that level....
About a year or two ago, I remember having been extremely shocked about a story I read on another Swiss forum:
a couple discovered that their foetus had Downs. At around 20 weeks, they decided to abort (their choice). Well, at that time you don't abort the same way than at 4 or 6 weeks of pregnancy: they give you a shot to stop the baby's heart, and then induce a 'normal' labour.
For some reason, the shot didn't work, and they ended up giving birth to a live baby, whom they kept in their arms for the time it took it to die 'peacefully'.
This image haunted me for weeks, even now I still feel bad writing about it. The parents were sure it was the right decision. It's their choice.
This test ruined my second pregnancy.. it came back positive 1/98.. what I did not know is that with my age the chances was that it would come back postive anyways... and that 99% of this test are false +.. anyways, at the time I did not know and it came back as a shock.. I did the amnio but after 3 weeks of agonising wait, I was told that the culture failed and that I needed to have the amnio redone... I had told myself I would want to do it again but the doctor convinced us to do it... I was an absolute mess, spend the 5th months of pregnancy as a limbo , trying to keep a straight face at work and in my classroom... anyways, we did the second amnio and this time the doc hurt me like hell because he could not put the needle properly in... In all this month, of course I imagined the worst things and the big mistake I made was spending far too much time on specialist pregnancy forum...anyways,after another week wait, I finallt got the result that i was expecting a perfect healthy baby girl....
my family and friends thought I was overreacted, that I was over pessimistic that there was nothing wrong with my baby.. but noboby apart from a mom geting through this can really understand about the psychological impact of this test when it comes positive..
Personnally, I wanted to know because i would not have wanted to carry on with the pregnancy.. If you are ready to welcome your baby whatever his health, no need to do the test or the amnio...
If I was pregnant again and because as I say I would want to know as it would affect my decision, I would go direct for the amnio and would skeep that stupid blood test.. a amnio is 100% acurate and this test has more + positive..out of 100 positive test results 1 % reveals a real problem...
Of course, there is the risk of losing a baby with an amnio but it is also a minimum... if your result comes + and you don't want to do the amnio there is no point having done the test in my opinion...
Sorry, Nicky, this is just the nucal fold measurement. In Istanbul they did it automatically but here you have to sign a paper to consent to it.
I'll be honest with you, I have worked with disable peoples when I was younger and that wasn't easy. Those poor souls were place in the hospital because of lack of help for the parents, lack of infrastructure, lack of energy....
In my case, the nucal fold was measured as a matter of course during the 13 week check. When my doctor realized that there was a lot more liquid there than should be, he did a triple blood test and on the basis of that I was given the odds of having a child with a chromosomal disorder.