I live in a little village called Castel San Pietro near Mendrisio but 1 Km from Mendrisio, 5 Kms from Como, 10kms from Lugano and you are not that far.
I actually find the Swiss of Ticino more friendly and have a sense of humour compared to the German-Swiss. Probably more of an Italian attitude.
I haven't met anyone yet from this site so wouldn't mind meeting up with you and other members in the Ticino area.
PM me and we can arrange something.
I just spent a weekend in Wroclaw, Poland and met some locals instantly at bars and while walking and they invited me to party with them and I shared stories about the Canadian Prairies and they about Poland. This has never happened to me in the 18 months I have been in CH. And people in Poland speak much less English than the Swiss.
Luckily I discovered the English Forum and have made many expat friends. Otherwise I know it can be lonely even in "big" Zurich.
So, you are in an isolated town in a "difficult" place. It's most likely not you, it is the situation. That's fine, so you've asked for help, and I think we reading should help in addition to posting.
So I think the only way to help it is for you to meet some of us. You've mentioned 2nd week August and late October. I say we set something up for you to meet some of us and hopefully kick start your social life. I think the best is to let you organise something ... maybe a trip to the big city ... or a trip for some of us down there. Or maybe we can meet in the middle. Luckily, Switzerland is tiny, well it is for a Western Canadian.
I think everyone has made their point and now it is time for action. I've been in your situation even in my home country, so I know how terrible it can be. Let's not let it last any longer.
And definitely get in touch with the people above who are close by. I am sure you can find some activities other than the bar to enjoy. Feel free to PM any of us (hopefully I can say that), as I know lots of people would love to help out. We've all had our troubles adjusting to Switerland. It's a beautiful place, but it takes some time and effort to get adjusted.
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> Village people tend to limit their evenings to the customary drink in the bar. You at least have to get down to Lugano, or better still, by train into Milano. The latest train from Milano Centrale to Chiasso leaves at about 23.30 and arrives in Chiasso at around 24.15.
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> to hang out at the lodgings of others is not very common, unless it is relatives or really very very good friends. People here tend to meet "outside".
Bellinzona may be a Canton Capital, but of course is not exactly an exciting place, to put it politely
Shy may not be the word really. And most do not feel a desire to "socialize" as they are proud owner of a TV-set
> a difficult place to make friends ? Possibly yes. But those who say otherwise neither are in "denial" nor lying, but simply misunderstand the point and the problem.
> the Swiss are extremely curious about foreigners but fear to be too intrusive and so being "undecent"
> language a barrier ? yes as many Swiss hesitate to use another language if they are not perfect in that language.
> to keep friends from childhood is deeply in the Swiss culture. But to establish new friendships at later stages of life is common. Whatever your Swiss friends "confirmed". I suspect them of "confirming" your views in order to be polite. And such politeness simply is outright wrong. An act of over the top Swiss "diplomacy" which I regard as rather dull
> Speaking another language nicely does not mean that you are not reserved. I as teenager on holidays in Italy always was the speaker for both my brother and myself, in spite of him having a far better command of Italian than I had. Oh sure, he could have made a mistake .........
and there is a meeting of members of Airliners.net ( www.airliners.net ) on that date at Zurich-Airport also
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Last train from Milan Central to Chiasso leaves Milan at 00:38 and arrives at about 01:50 and is filthy old Italian rolling stock stopping at every station on the way.
It is the train I have to take when I fly in to Milan in the summer season - Bergamo Airport from Luton on my £6 return Ryan Air flights.
I'm scared the bungie would malfunction!
Well, and motion sickness is an issue for me
Meanwhile... was was this canoe thing being discussed...?
Sky, this is not for me but for Salsa Lover actually. Read his posts and you will see. It is he who needs these tips as he feels disconnected more than ever.
You're not alone. Roveredo is a forgotten place. Not part of Ticino, not quite an integral part of GR either, that area is only famous for granting out an exaggerated abundance of traffic tickets for the tiniest violations. A friend of mine who had to move there from a bigger Swiss city felt as if she ended up in Antarctica or something. On the other hand, a host of beautiful spots can be reached from there. Have you ever explored the S. Bernardino region?
Yes, valley dwellers tend to speak dialect routinely, but they'll most likely make an effort when dealing with a respectful foreigner. Moreover, most younger Ticinesi have taken at least some English classes at school, they just don't get many chances to practice speaking it so they might not come across as knowledgeable as they really are.
As to the cultural sympathy you're looking for, that will never be fully achieved. Although many Europeans consistently look up to Americans regarding fashion, art (cinema, music), sports and style in general, they still haven't absorbed the deeper cultural baggage that comes with those totems. The contrast with local traditions is huge. Authority, crime, religion, racial diversity etc. as compared to abroad are themes that are rarely addressed with any depth in the educational setting (parents tend to be too busy, while teachers are too politically correct). The best introdution to American culture for the average Swiss may well be TV soaps and the alternating crowds of presidential suporters, so you be the judge.
But your success in integrating also depends a lot on you and on what brought you here. Where in the States are you from? Is the geography, the climate etc. similar to that in your hometown, or diametrally different?
A note on the churches. As you noticed, they are depressing places here, that's why you'll usually only find a handful of old bigots attending. The rule is: the bigger the city, the colder the church, which doesn't exactly represent the center of social life anymore. Malls, and the Internet, are.
They do tend to be full of old people though. As a step toward integration in the community, I can imagine that joining a church might be a fantastic move - it's true that many of these people are from fine old families that you might not otherwise meet - but you certainly won't be plunged into a busy whirl of social activity. Usually there'll be coffee after the service, there'll be occasional church picnics, concerts and volunteer opportunities, and after a few months you may be invited to join a small-group Bible study in someone's home.
Where?