Predivorce Parental Agreement vs KESB

So it looks like I am about to divorce my wife with which I have an amazing 8yo daughter.
Daughter wants to stay 100% with me and for mother to visit her time to time. Together with my wife we have drafted an agreement stating that I will cover all my daughter needs, that she will stay with me and that my ex-wife will be able to visit her for one weekend per month, have have for every other Christmas / Easter, have her for two weeks of Summer school break and one week of Spring and Autum school break. Is it something that KESB can reject? I am really attached to my little one and she is to me.

Bonus question. While my wife didn’t agree to me permanently leaving the country with my daughter - it is something that this agreement recognizes. Does anyone know how process of obtaining the permission from KESB for leaving the country looks like?

Bonus question no 2. My wife is here on a B permit connected to mine. What will happen with her if I submit a petition to leave the country with my daughter?

What is your 8 year old’s feeling in all of this? How much contact does she want to have with her mother? How does she feel about leaving Switzerland, school, friends?

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Often she will lose her permit when it is tied to yours. How long have you both been here?

4 years. She started to look for work, but she cannot yet afford to stay here on her own

She is actually saying that she would like to go back to our country of origin as she is missing her cousins, gradma etc. She says that she just want to be with me and if we can, we should move back. When I explained to her the agreement she said ‘ok’

The question is not your little contract that frankly sounds like your wife doesn’t understand. It is the question of custody. Which by standard of law is shared between the parents. And by law your wife cannot even just give full custody to you - it needs to be confirmed by a court.

Plot twist. The little contract that sounds like my wife does not understand was written by her :slight_smile: I am aware that it is a matter of custody and that we need to confirm it at KESB. This is what I am asking here. We both agreed to those terms. I love my daughter, my wife… has other priorities. I want to be with my daughter, my wife… has other priorities.

My main questions here are: how much KESB can change in that parental agreement after we sign it and we submit it. And how does the process of asking KESB for permission to leave the country when the other parent do not agree to it - my wife is afraid that in 8-12 months she can have a change of heart and would like to be more involved in our daughters life.

KESB will decide based on what they think is in the best interest of the child. Which may even mean they decide that you cannot leave even if you have sole custody. Nobody here knows you or can assess the case or this little agreement you wrote up.

Go see a qualified lawyer.

If you want to leave Switzerland, and your wife!s permit is tied to yours. Maybe it would be better around leave as a family and then divorce in your home country. Then you have no danger of getting entangled in Swiss laws and them saying that you can’t leave with your daughter because your ex is staying in Switzerland.

Hm.

I explained the agreement to my daughter. It was a reply to a question regarding my daughter opinion about seeing my wife only so often.

My wife was a co-author of the agreement. We discussed on every point and she was the one that put it in place.

My wife does not want to leave. And she does not want our daughter to leave just in case she will grow a heart at some point. So my only option is to ask KESB for permission. But I cannot find any info about this process

If your wife has to permission to stay, and doesn’t want her daughter to leave - you’ll be stuck here until she’s an adult.

Why? KESB wont allow me to move? I thought that if the parental agreement can be fulfilled and kid wants to stay with me I will be able to leave with her

You need to talk to a lawyer. Nobody on this forum will be able to give you the answer you want to hear. Not even if somebody on here is qualified.

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Her mother will be able to say the agreement won’t be able to be fulfilled for a start, how would you do the monthly weekend when living in a different country? She can say that she can’t afford to take time off to travel either side of the weekend, pay for flights and accommodation. Your daughter won’t be able to take days off school each month to travel to Switzerland for a weekend.

If her mother protests, you won’t have a chance of taking her out of the country.

Okay, here’s the question no one’s asked you yet. Are you/your wife EU or non-EU nationals? If you’re both non-EU and you divorce then your wife is going to lose her residence permit since she gets that from being married to you. That means she would have to leave the country within a certain period unless she can find a Swiss employer willing to apply for a new permit on her behalf and to do that the Swiss employer has to prove they can’t find a Swiss/EU national who could do the job.